It’s not every day I can consider myself a professional artist. Though technically since I have sold art, it is loosely a term I can attribute to myself. After painting all summer long, someone in Louisville Kentucky found one of my tables and fell in love. That love cost $300. $200 for the table, and $100 for the shipping. Can you already feel the dread to come?
Art is valued only at the price is bought for. Currently our running tally is $300 value for this table. I spent 5 hours (300 minutes) creating this table. That looks really pretty doesn’t it? $1 a minute.
No. it gets ugly.
However I digress. Yet you will get the whole story.
This story is really about the kindness of those around me. and Cupcakes.
As I have moved to Seattle, and am storing my painted tables at my parent’s house (thank you Mama and Papa Dodge) I was elated by this sale and begged my Mom to get it out of the shed and make sure no damage had been done. Only thing worse than making a sale, is refunding it due to a table that had rain leak on it, or raccoons create a next in woodchips they made. I was wrong. The shipping was the worst.
My poor Mom slaved at finding me cardboard to pack the table into. And this was after discovering that it couldn’t be taken apart easily for reassembly in KT.
Eventually she found a cardboard box big enough. It cost $40. Ouch. Mom managed to package the table up nicely with some tabletop protection. Bless her. Here’s the next obstacle. The table does not fit into the sedan. She calls her friend with a van, and they venture to take the table to UPS for me. They get there and are told shipping this table will cost $192.
Online shipping calculator you HAVE FAILED TO TELL ME THAT THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN 30 INCHES AND 32 INCHES would be the difference of what I pay for my phone bill every month.
The only thing worse than this news was that when I received this news I was on the bus. I was THAT girl talking on the bus to a service rep at UPS about shipping a painted coffee table. I told him I wasn’t going to do that and there should have been some kind of chart system online if things are going to be that drastically different. Unfortunately I had to bite the bullet and pay for it to be shipped anyway.
What a terrible, terrible day. I guess I have art living on the other side of the country now. One table in Texas and on in Kentucky. That is a little bit cool. But the profit of $66 was little sad.
I thanked my Mom and her friend, though I think we were all frustrated by the time the ordeal was over.
After my bus trip I went into a cupcake shop. I was on my way to rehearsal for a play that I am currently Stage Managing, and as I am a good example didn’t skip and get wasted. The transaction went a little like this.
Cupcake Maiden: Hi, how are you doing today?
Me: (staring at cupcakes) um, what? I’m sorry I didn’t hear you.
CM: I just asked how you were doing (smiles)
Me: (chuckle) Actually, I’m feeling pretty terrible, that’s why I’m here.
CM: Oh, I’m sorry, I hope we can help.
Me: Me too. I need a cupcake that says “I wish you were a beer”
Me: …. I think I’ll take the eggnog to-go.
CM: sure thing, is there anything else I can get you today?
Me: Um… I’ll take a hot tea. Mao Feng Shui sounds like the one. I need some better chi.
CM: alright, I’ll get that for you right now.
(this is the boring part where I wait and look at other menu items and wish that I had gotten the apple cider but decide the tea will be great too, I then have the cupcake and tea in front of me)
CM: the cupcake is on the house so your total is $2.75 today.
Me: What? Oh you don’t have to do that….thank you
CM: It’s no trouble; I just hope you feel better. (smiles)
(This is where I want to cry, but am incapable since I am so stunned by her kindness, I feel like I may have blacked out after that because I don’t remember the rest I was so fuzzy inside).
Rehearsal also went well, and the cupcake was delicious.
Thank you Cupcake Maiden, Mom, Van-Friend, and consumer of my art. It’s been a wild couple of days, and I just would like to give a shout-out to putting $66 on my tax return under my other income section.
all for now